How did we get here?

38 hours in

My memories of the last ten hours of gameplay are somewhat sketchy. Something about walking under a frozen lake to end up in a desert which quickly became a grassy plain and now we're up in the snowy peaks of Mount Gagazet. I think that's all the usual backdrops utilised.

So anyway. Mount Gagazet. Home of the noble Ronso, big blue lion thingies. I've always had a bit of a thing for lion men. I think Ron Perlman started it as Vincent in Beauty and the Beast. How sexy is he? Unfortunately, in real life he looks like he's trying to swallow a bag of walnuts. Anyway, as a result of my little fixation, I feel rather protective towards little broken horn Kimahri, so when Biran and Yenke come swaggering over, I find myself shouting at the screen; "Yeah, well at least he's not wearing little saggy pants!" and "How can anyone profess to be hard when they're mincing about in a sports bra!" But turns out it's easy enough to duff them up good and proper and they show their respect by leading a performance by the Ronso Male-Voice Choir. Naturally.

Then ol' blue hair is back for another go, with a lame accomplice called Mortis Body who is more of a hindrance than a help in many ways. In fact, he's so easy to defeat, it's easy to forget. It's easy to get cocky. And so, when I get to my next, inevitable meeting with the hairy titted one (some one should tell him the only thing worse than his bizarre Rorschach test chest tattoos is the fact that they're hairy) I'm thinking, 'Piece of piss.'

Only it isn't. And I still haven't beaten him yet, the fey, zombie-inducing shit.